‘Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to wife and the two shall become one flesh.’
Very often these words from Genesis 2:24 are quoted during wedding ceremonies as a lovely expectation for the loving new couple. While leaving his father and mother and joining to a wife seems simple enough, time and again, becoming one flesh ends up being a arduous marital task with the husband bewildered and the wife bemused as to why that didn’t happen during the consummation of the marriage!
I’m so very thankful for the little words in the bible that illuminate the big phrases. In this case, the little word is ‘shall’ and means ‘a foretelling of something to happen in the future’. Wow….what a relief! Becoming one flesh is a process that happens over time.
It takes time to get into the thoughts, ideas and plans of your spouse. It takes time to appreciate another person’s values and make the necessary adjustments in your daily routines to accommodate them. The process of becoming one flesh doesn’t happen instantaneously, but rather by trial and error. Yup, trial and error! In marriage, learning what to do to become one flesh often occurs by learning what not to do. It’s a process that is rife with mistakes, hurt, disappointment and failure. It’s also a process full of rewards.
So here’s to the process. Take time. Be patient. Be forgiving. Your marriage is worth it!